Why bottle up?
This is for all the people out there who are emotionally expressive
“Emotions are important and it is even more important to keep it intact”. “Know when to show your emotions and when to not”. “You can’t go on a crying spree over silly issues”. “Crying makes you weak” “Only depressed people cry”. “I don’t know why are you crying over such a small thing?” “Don’t be too caring or attached”….
I am sure we all have heard these comments at least once in our lifetime. Being an emotional person, I can say that crying does not make a person weak, it is a form of expressing your feelings like pain, happiness or anger.
I cry when I hear a song, I cry when I am overwhelmed, I cry when I watch a movie. I cry over a small mishap for which I have been mocked and been called as wuss. I am tired of being told that one should not cry for trivial things. In fact, I started feeling embarrassed of having that trait. Am I weak? Don’t I have the emotional intelligence? How do others keep their emotions intact? “Is joy the absence of tears?” A plethora of questions raised in my mind.
I was restless to get sensible solutions for my problem only to find out that it is not actually a problem but just a form of expression. I have always looked at people who wouldn’t cry easily and considered them strong and admired them. How are they holding it together? But when I did a little deep dive, I found that they are just suppressing and hiding their emotions. Of course, they have their own reasons which lead them to be who they are but listening to their stories got me thinking that I have never held back on expressing myself.
I have never held back in showing my care or compassion to another person. I have been kind to those who have been rude to me as well. I was always advised to treat people like how they treat me and I have tried but it felt like forcing me to be something I am not. I am happy being a compassionate and caring person even if it hurts like hell at times. IT IS ME. I put in efforts and don’t give up on someone because I feel they do have some good in them. This is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength in being who you are and expressing yourself and being genuine.
Yes, it is a cruel world for an emotional person to survive but the world has become cruel because of the lack of sensitivity, empathy, compassion and that is what is needed in today’s world.
It does not mean I am asking you to sit and cry all the time deliberately or seek attention but whenever you actually feel overwhelmed and you want to cry, then don’t hold back let it out. It is okay to cry on friend’s shoulder, to seek help, to feel bad and over think a trivial issue.
Often, we ignore a problem thinking it is a small issue. We feel embarrassed to feel bad about such a trivial thing. We don’t even share or communicate it thinking it will make us look immature. That is the problem. The society has set a standard of major things that can be considered as a problem like losing someone close to you, being sick or going through divorce or breakup as people can sympathize and understand these but sometimes problems doesn’t have to be big it can be a small thing like an inhibition, a misunderstanding, a fight with a friend, feeling of being left out and even a small thing as breaking one of your belongings. These can also be a problem for which one can be sad but is not discussed as it is considered trivial over the former problems. Well I suggest that problems big or small have to be expressed. It might start as a small problem but might lead to a disaster.
So why bottle up your emotions when u badly want to let it out? As Sharukh Khan says in Dear Zindagi, “if you can’t cry out openly then how will you be able to laugh out openly”? So laugh openly, Cry openly and Love openly. There is no need of feeling embarrassed. Don’t force yourself to be someone you are not.
Next time someone says Crying is a sign of weakness; tell them that being emotionally expressive is a strength. An emotionally intelligent person is not someone who hides their feelings or emotions but the one who can truly expresses it. So if you cry often it does not mean you are not emotionally intelligent but deciding to stay low in the same state and not trying to move on from it is when you are considered emotionally unintelligent.
Wear your heart on your sleeve and be proud………….!!!!!!!