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STEP MOTHER-THE DEMONIZED ANGEL.

 

It could be a pure sense of relaxation or an after effect of long drawn thoughts repeatedly emphasized on the portrait of a mother but it directly connects to a sense of being immersed in higher energy , when it comes to the feeling enclosed within the word “Mother”. Accepting  it  either way, former or latter , the realization of this feeling is “I am home” sort of purity. Now that we live in a “I judge the best ,that too without even knowing  world!” , it hurts to confess that, we do judge a person harshly & become  more blood thirsty when we judge them under any label. For instance eve n a mother! The whole media, be it internet or news paper or news channels agree with me and prove my point loudly when I say that a step mother has always been portrayed as an evilish-devilsh dirty queen trying to emphasize her kingdom to rule as sole ruler! But is it all to the picture? Are there any chances that this could be only the bitter half story of the reality?  To stop here for a moment and actually think about it- is a real necessity. Can there be things hidden on “less thought” thought side? May be NOT All of the second mothers are a KRUELLA THE DEVIL, may be it’s us thinking from so long that “sauteli maa” is poecilonym for a dementor from Harry Potter! that has made it a firm belief.May be A BIG YES! There are fair chances that things could be far more different than what we have always learnt  as an eternal truth.

Let’s for once dig a little more deep into the subject. Starting from our own selves, the very first impression that we “NORM”ally get on coming across –“a child has a step mother” – bechara…! In a heart beat it will be concluded sub/unconsciously. There is no second opinion on the sorrow that is stricken with the word just like the good vibes connected to the word maa. Do we ever happen to give it one closer look before going for shame on the mother & mercy on the kid at first sight? We,by default, condemn the mother as  harsh & the child a  victim. We never happen to judge our own judgment and blindly call her down for treating the children in inhumane ways. Nobody ever walks an extra mile to see if the kids might be happy ? Their time might be hard but they are spending a good life with their step-mother? The step mother might love the kids more than herself? Ever wondered, the father might be really appreciating the women’s efforts & the step mother might really be  trying so hard to heal the wounds of her step children?

It is for always true that every woman develops an incredible &  unexplainable relation while the child is in her womb during those 9 months, there can be no two opinions on that fact. However, it is not fair either to set that as a criteria to judge the step mother.She WILL NOT develop that relation but it in no way declares that she CAN NOT have any other good connection with the kids. It is again an undeniable truth that the unique love received by the women who gave birth to the child can NEVER be delivered by any other POSSIBLE HUMAN/NON HUMAN LIFE  but to over and over again bring this point up & then  compare the love that the step mother is giving to her child is inhumane too. No discrepancy for birth giver’s feelings but to stab the person who is trying to provide the kids with all the warmth and affection she can at the moment , with continuous bitter word is harsh & unfair.Yes, it is the truth that there have been many  soul shaking cases with re-married family but in those cases there are strong chances that they were a happy living re-married family. How come do we know that these were not the harsh reactions of people that did not turn the goodness of her heart in cruelty? Should not we think about what are we doing to the lady? May be the demonized women we see through media is just reflection of how was she treated by the chaar log even after her immense love and care for the children. There are possibilities that the cases that turned into stories that can not be accepted on human ground all started with our outlook towards step mother who was trying it hard to keep it all together but we destroyed her morale. It is not easy for the lady too. TO marry a widowed man , to be accepted by him, to love him and get his love back , to heal him, to live the former wife’s memories and customs, to get involved with the children and nourishing them. She feels responsible for every dispute and blames her ownself,all women might be or might not be like this ,just like it depends on person to person and likewise is for women too, but there are women who holds themselves responsible for every minute dispute in a remarried family. It’s not always that the kids are poor and husband is helpless and the woman is devil. There have been cases where the father was a brutal human and the mother saved her step children from the cruelty of father

There are children who were brought up by a NON-BIOLOGICAL MOTHER and they never discovered it. There are mothers who raised their step children with whole of the love that could provide them, who give their children time to accept her and do their best to be accepted by them, she do understand their trauma of losing their mother and helps them heal. Yes, this happens in real, it aint any fairy tale! But we are so much filled by media’s information that we never think the other way round. Yes, it’s true that there are mothers who sell their step children to people for exploitation but it is also truth that not all are the same ,this truth needs to get highlighted time and again so that people starts believing that there are such women who sacrifices a lot for their step children too. Not all step mothers throws acid on their children’s private parts, not all step mother quarrel between their children and step children, not all of them are alike. To accept that majority of step mothers can (can not) be like “trembling soul with just an eye sight” but for sure there are step mothers who  dearly love their kids . Since this is never shown or highlighted in media so we never come across such things. These women do want to and do their best to accept these kids and make them feel in the best possible manner she can but all these efforts are not highlighted and hence we are all unaware.

The points that are being put forward are not a castle built in air, these words might seem little off the beat because we do not hear them much often about step mother , many thanks to media to define our outlook towards her. The sour cases  were always and are always highlighted in media because it is what sells- THE DEMON SIDE. And hence we have always seen such things only , no denying that our mind and information is now controlled by media that we are all time surrounded by be it internet(whatsapp, facebook,instagram,twitter etc.), newspaper or television broadcast. Through this article I aim to shift the focus  on other side of the reality.  Hopes are that through this article, readers,  now, will give it a close  second thought before judging the step mother as an  evil of the Cinderella movie!. Not all step mother burn their step children ,some of them do heal their deep wounds. She might not be the biological mother, she can never be but she do her best to sooth them, keep them happy, heal them, support them. We need to change our glasses and make our heart a little bit more soft and neutral before judging her. I hope this article will change at least one  judging eye!

 

 

~*~

 

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